Losses come our way in life. We know that to be true, though we often pretend otherwise. It could be the loss of a position, or the loss of wealth, or even one final failure that envelopes us is the loss of health – we die.
We are born into the world to live. In fact, as Americans we have the Right to Life, guaranteed us in our Constitution. We accomplish much, fail frequently, reassemble ourselves in our lives, start over again…. Rinse and repeat until we pass away, pretending that the failures are invisible. Successes are all we want to be seen publicly.
However, there is an upside to failing publicly, if only if we’ll allow it to be. It’s called failing forward.
Meg Greenfield’s bio calls her “an American editorial writer who worked for The Washington Post and Newsweek. She was also a Washington, D.C., insider, known for her wit. Greenfield won a Pulitzer Prize for Editorial Writing.” She wrote her remarkable book, Washington, in secrecy at the end of her life. The book was published posthumously. I call her a VERY brave person.
And here’s why.
Though set in the Capitol City of our country, the book deals with political power abuses and problems that exist in all 50 state capitols, 3,007 counties and in the 19,495 cities within those counties. The book deals with how this toxic political power often “grows” within American leaders, many of whom win their local races, advancing towards the coveted crown jewel seats in State Legislatures and in our U.S. Congress of House and Senate. Or possibly even a chance to become a member of the very elite short list of 50 individuals who have served as Vice President… OR the 45 men who have served in 47 presidencies.
As another noted D.C. insider, Gary Bauer, once told me, “A thousand heads hit their pillows each night dreaming of becoming President of the United States.” Even knowing that inflated fact, Gary ran for President in 2000 in the crowded field of candidates that produced George W. Bush’s victory. Just to be clear, he wasn’t elected…
It’s an overall compelling, magnetic attraction that keeps people who win elections continuing, running and winning election after election. The inner voice whispers to themselves, “If John Kennedy, Richard Nixon, Bill Clinton or J.D. Vance can ascend the political ladder rapidly, so might I…”
Yes, it’s true, people win in Vegas, as well. Just not too many.
But what if a person loses and keeps on trying? (More on that in a minute.)
It’s also true that people DO leave the trappings of power in politics.
Meg Greenfield said this:
“From time to time, someone who has voluntarily or even involuntarily moved away from the capital will come back for a visit and proclaim with great satisfaction (knowing full well the inner churning this will cause) the unthinkable proposition that “there is life after Washington.” People will chuckle and nod, as if to say, “Well, of course.” But few can imagine that this could actually be true. This is very much in the mode of the high schooler who spent four years desperately wishing to get older and more senior and to the top but who really doesn’t want and is secretly afraid to leave when senior year is over.”
Let’s expand this fear of losing to the everyday life we all lead.
In all of our lives there are key moments when failure hits hard. When the promotion didn’t come your way, the contract was won by another company, though you were ASSURED it was yours for the taking. When financial loss was at your doorstep or medical loss stole your energy. When public tragedies occur.
You pick your example. Don’t’ take too much time, just blink and think.
Do you have it now? Ok, realizing that in all of our lives, these terrible things assault us, what can we do to fail forward?
For me it was the recent assassination of Charlie Kirk.
Earlier in the year, my friend Tom Allen, gave me a book titled Our Church Speaks by Ben Lansing and D. J. Marotta. Written in 2024 it deals with followers of Jesus throughout the years who have withstood incredibly difficult times – even martyrdom, as Charlie experienced. As I’ve been reading this solid book, thinking about the very public images of Charlie Kirk being killed by a round to the neck and dying in front of the world, I was deeply impacted. He stood for Christ and died, sprawled out in the back seat of a friend’s car as they sped to the hospital, arriving too late.
How do we each process this sadness? I have some suggestions for you to consider. They are my well-worn and deeply felt realities of dealing with sadness and failure:
- Embrace the age-old Shakespeare English translation of the word persevere: “Long suffering”. Realize that whatever the problem is, “it came to pass”. it didn’t come to stay. Never give up. Never surrender.
- When you stumble forward, your eyes, arms, and hands move quickly through muscle memory to protect the rest of your body as you hit the ground hard. So it is with the muscle memory of your mind and spirit. What you practice in private you employ immediately in public. Think Judo. Don’t think Karate.
- Acknowledge the past losses and failures in your life but don’t believe the lie that the past will repeat itself. Life is new every morning. It is meant to be lived to the fullest.
Persevere.
We’ve all read the proverbial list of Abraham Lincoln’s repeated losses. But have we ever read the comparison of those losses with his successes during those same moments of his life? He fell forward, repeatedly.
Orson Welles’s failures in film are noteworthy. After his masterpiece, Citizen Kane, it’s as if the actor/director became either invisible or a cartoonish caricature of himself. But is that true? “No!” says Simon Callow. “Like him or loathe him, once you had encountered Orson Welles, you could never forget him.” And the world has not soon forgotten Orson Welles.
Finally, Winston Churchill’s examples of failures are legend but after being turned out of office in 1945, just after defeating Nazi Germany, he fell forward six years later and became, again, the Prime Minister of England.
“(I)t was little wonder that Churchill and the Tories lost the 1945 election. It was equally predictable that winning a general election would be his obsession. Churchill narrowly lost the 1950 contest (Labour’s majority was reduced to six), but again he managed to sidestep retirement. Just over a year later, with the Labour government in deep crisis about a number of ill-conceived policies, yet another election was called. This time Churchill was victorious. In October 1951, he became prime minister again and was vindicated.”
Winston Churchill’s own words explain his method of failing forward and never giving in:
Think Judo, not Karate.
The art of falling forward demands a sense of always knowing where you are, where you are heading and where you will be landing. Judo’s key elements combine to cause opponents to be imbalanced and unsteady. Karate is the martial art of striking, kicking and attempting to debilitate an opponent’s strength. Judo often dominates Karate. The key for each of us is to know we are going to hit the mat, it’s only a matter of time. Once that happens it is HOW we respond through muscle memory of the mind and spirit to regain our footing.
If a picture is worth a thousand words, then a video is worth much more. The one who grapples, uses balance techniques and takes the karate black belt down is the judo black belt:
Acknowledge the past losses.
As many who receive this Newsletter know, I am currently a candidate for a City Council seat in Garden City, Idaho. Election Day is this upcoming month, on November 4th. As many may NOT know, I have run for office before. And lost.
I ran and lost when I was 24 years old. I was on the ballot with former-Governor Ronald Reagan as he sought the Presidency. I ran two years later at age 26 when it appeared there was a stronger chance to win. I was defeated by a sitting countypolitician. 17 years later, at the age of 43 I announced for Congress and after a spirited and well-funded race, I was defeated in the primary by the Lt. Governor. In 2002 and 2006 I ran against a State Senator and came up short both times.
But there’s more. In 2022 I received the nomination of my party and ran for state senate. It was a well-funded race but I lost.
And I never “gave in”, as Churchill coined the phrase. When an open seat on my local city council became vacant, I decided to submit myself as a candidate and am running a robust, well-funded race to serve the people of my neighborhood and my city. I intend on winning.
Failures? Sure. I acknowledge them all, just as I acknowledgethe many successes I have had by running and winning races for others who were candidates for Legislature, county office and US Congress. When I see names like Congressman Helen Chenoweth, Congressman Bill Sali, Congressman-now-Attorney General Raul Labrador (with the help of my youngest son – Colin Mansfield), Congressman Russ Fulcher, US Senator Mike Crapo, when he first ran for Congress, I smile because I was a part of every one of them. From 1992 to the mid 2000’s I had the honor of helping with dozens of successful races for the Idaho Legislature – all winning big – with one exception: the current Idaho Speaker of the House of Representatives, Mike Moyle was elected by 13 votes as a result of the staffer I placed with him to help on his maiden campaign – my oldest son, Nate Mansfield. And a win is a win.
I see the success of the Idaho Family Forum’s decade-long service in the 1990’s to the people of my state. I smile when I see the work of our staffed, safe and sober housing company that successfully housed and helped over 4,000 ex-addicts and ex-inmates, as they gained hope and a new life. I smile when I see how my published books have helped AND been appreciated by many people across the world.
Falling forward through perseverance, using judo not karate and acknowledging my past losses without being owned by them, all combine to help you and me embrace theologian Reinhold Niebuhr’s prayer that asks “for serenity to accept the things one cannot change, courage to change the things one can, and the wisdom to distinguish between the two.”
More later,
Den
Den's Latest & Greatest
- If you haven’t yet investigated the race I’m running for, Garden City Council member, please click here, If you can donate to our efforts, we would sincerely appreciate it. Please donate here.
- The election is Nov 4th, so please feel free to visit the County Register of Voters on the 5th and see how well we did! Also, please Like or Follow my Campaign Facebook page for results during the evening of the 4th with final results being posted later that evening.
- With that recent assassination of Charlie Kirk, I would highly suggest buying this book, Our Church Speaks. It puts in perspective the lives lost throughout the time since Christ walked on earth – and how those lives changed the history of mankind. Charlie’s death is having a profound effect on the men and women who have been challenged by this despicable murder – yet, knowing that as Genesis 50:20 states, “As for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good in order to bring about this present result, to keep many people alive.”
- Also, I highly recommend Washington by Meg Greenfield. It is a masterclass in understanding the political mind and process.